As a goal-setting, progress tracking, schedule-making, resolution-loving guru, New Years has always been a favorite holiday of mine. As a kid, I loved New Years because it meant I got to stay up past my bedtime to join in the celebration. Now, this disruption to my sleep schedule is ironically my least favorite part about the holiday! Still, I buzz with excitement as I anticipate the New Year to come, inspired by the fresh start that it brings.
As we look ahead to 2019, many of us (myself included) are eagerly considering the areas in our lives that we desire to improve and the habits we aspire to cultivate. In the past, I have made many goals and resolutions in the dawning of the New Year. While some of my efforts have proven to be more successful than others, I have learned valuable lessons from my successes and failures alike. I am a strong believer that the Lord does not teach us things purely for our own benefit, but also for the benefit and edification of those in our community. In light of this conviction, allow me to humbly share some truth the Lord has gracious revealed to me through my own journey of personal development.
- Start by focusing on ONE THING instead of trying to do a lifestyle overhaul. It’s easy to get overly ambitious and try to take on too many improvements at once. While discussing this temptation to overhaul with one of my mentors, she shared with me an eye-opening statistic: When we set out to change or create just one habit, our chances for success are on average about 80%. However, when we add just one more habit, trying to pursue both at the same time, our chances of success drop to 20%. Wow! When you spread your attention between too many pursuits, often times you are unable to stick with all of them for very long. Even if you are able to maintain all of them for a period of time, you are incapable of performing them with as much excellence as you otherwise would be if you were to focus on mastering one goal at a time.
- Consider your WHY before starting. Let me share a personal example: When I was thirteen, I finally mustered up enough motivation to commit myself to the goal of losing weight. I had battled with my low self-esteem and poor body image for many years and even in my young age, these insecurities regarding my appearance produced intense fear. I was fearful that unless I changed my physical self, I would be seen as unlovable. I was often told I had a beautiful heart, and I believed it to be true, but I was terrified that this beautiful heart would never have the chance to be discovered or appreciated if people did not want to take the time to get to know me because they rejected my physical appearance. It was from this place of fear and self-disgust that I put a stake in the ground and set out on my goal of losing weight. Six months later, I had lost 45 pounds. But as the initial thrill and excitement of this accomplishment wore off and my new size became my new normal, I realized that the way I had gone about this pursuit to lose weight only served to reinforce the distorted belief that I am only lovable when I look a certain way. Thankfully, as my health journey has continued, the Lord has dramatically renovated my heart and He has dismantled this belief by shining the light of His truth on His unconditional love for me. From this experience I learned the importance of reflecting on my source of motivation. Sometimes we get so focused on what we want to change that we never take time to consider the reason why we want to change. Before we invest our time and resources in a goal, we need to dig into what beliefs are tied to the results we are desiring.
- Commit you plans to the Lord. Proverbs 16:3 instructs, “Whatever you do, do it as service to Him, and He will guarantee your success” (The Voice). So often we set out to pursue a goal, and quickly find ourselves running out of steam to keep moving forward. However, when we hit this wall, we should not be surprised. We are finite beings and as such we have a limited amount of strength and perseverance to draw from on our own. Yet, when we partner with the Holy Spirit in prayer, we have the ability to draw strength from the well that never runs dry. It delights our Father’s heart when we talk to Him about our passions and desires. As we talk with Him, He will bring fresh inspiration and direction as we continue in our pursuits. When we act from a heart motivated by love for the Lord and a desire to please Him, we gain access to the immeasurable power of the Holy Spirit, and with this weapon we cannot lose the battle.
It is my prayer that the Lord would add His understanding to these lessons that He has taught me and that you would be blessed in all your pursuits of the coming New Year!